It Takes Two To Tango — Watch any husband and wife – they are almost predictable. In the morning the husband will spread his newspaper and start reading, and the wife will say the same thing that she has been saying for years, and the husband will react in the same way. It has become almost structured, programmed.
Just small changes and you will be surprised. Tomorrow, don’t sit in your chair early in the morning and start reading your paper. Just start cleaning the house, and see what happens. Your wife will be wide-eyed, and she will not be able to believe what has happened to you. Smile when you see your wife, hug and see how she is taken aback. You have never hugged her. Years have passed, and you have never looked into the poor woman’s eyes.
Tonight, just sit in front of her, look into her eyes. She will think in the beginning that you have gone crazy, you have become a Rajneesh freak or something, but don’t be worried. Just hold her hand and be ecstatic. If you cannot be, at least pretend. Be ecstatic. Sometimes it happens that if you start pretending, it starts happening! Just start smiling, for no reason at all, and watch. Your poor woman may have a heart attack!
You have not been holding her hand – do you remember since how long? Have you taken her for a morning walk? Or when the moon is full, have you taken her for a walk in the night under the stars? She is also human, she also needs love.
But particularly people in India go on using women as if they are just servants. Their whole world consists of taking care of the children and the kitchen and the house, as if that’s their whole life. Have you respected your wife as a human being? Have you sat by her side sometimes, silently, just holding her hand, not saying a word, just feeling her, and letting her feel you? No, that is not done in India at all. Wives and husbands have only one kind of communication: quarreling.
Very rarely have I seen husbands and wives respectful to each other. Using each other, exploiting each other, reducing each other to things, but never respecting each other’s divinity – then this hell is created.
Don’t think that only your wife is responsible. Start changing your life. Give the poor woman a little feeling of significance. Give the little woman a little feeling that she’s needed. Do you know the greatest need in life is to be needed? And unless a person feels that he or she is needed, his or her life remains meaningless, desert-like. If you love a person, the person immediately becomes beautiful! Love is such an alchemical process. Look at a person with loving eyes, and suddenly you will see his, her aura changing.