Pardon My Garden – Bill Condon

Pardon my garden, it’s vicious today!
The cucumber’s going quite mad —
The onions and peas
Just do as they please,
The pumpkin is awfully bad.

The squash and the sprout are rushing about
As if they’re preparing for war,
I just got a scare from a peach and a pear —
The apple is vile to the core!

Pardon my garden, it’s vicious today!
There’s tori-chori below.
The corn and the bean are having a scene —
That ghia just nibbled my toe!

That tomato and grape are aping an ape
And heading this way with a skewer —
And all because I fertilised
My garden with tiger manure.

∼ Bill Condon