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Medical Slang Acronyms

Alphabetical Listing of Medical Slang Acronyms

  • 10TH FT — 10th Floor Transfer – Dying (floor Number Is Always The Next Number On From The Highest Floor In The Hospital).
  • 3H — “Enema That Is “”high, Hot, And A Hell of A Lot.”” Reputedly Given To Patients Who Give Staff A Hard Time.”
  • 3PS — Pill, Permissiveness And Promiscuity (relates To Female Patients With Sexually Transmitted Disease)
  • 404 — 404 Moment. On Card Rounds – When A Patient’s Medical Records Cannot Be Located (from Internet Error Message: 404 Page Not Found)
  • 45C — Patient Is One Chromosome Short of A Full Set (questionable IQ)
  • 4F — Fair, Fat, Female And Forty OR Fat, Forty-ish, Flatulent Female (both Mean Abdominal Pain Patient Who Is Candidate For Gall Bladder Disease)
  • 4H — (US) Haemophiliac, Hispanic, Homosexual, Heroin Addict
  • 5-H-1-T — Polite Medical Term For Shit
  • ADR — Ain’t Doing Right
  • AE — Aggressive Euthanasia – A Procedure That Obnoxious Patients Would Benefit From.
  • AFUBR — All Fucked Up & Beyond Repair
  • AGA — Acute Gravity Attack (fell Over)
  • AGMI — Ain’t Gonna Make It (won’t Survive)
  • AHF — Acute Hissy Fit
  • ALC — A La Casa (send The Patient Home)
  • ALP — Acute Lead Poisoning – Gunshot Wound
  • ALP185 — Acute Lead Poisoning, 185 Grain Injection – 9mm Gunshot Wound
  • ALP240 — Acute Lead Poisoning, 240 Grain Injection 44 Calibre Magnum Wound
  • ALPAC — Acute Lead Poisoning Air-conditioned – Multiple Gun Shot Wounds
  • ALS — Absolute Loss of Sanity (nutcase)
  • AMYOYO — Alright Motherfucker, You’re On Your Own (seen In Head Injury Patients In Intensive Care)
  • AOB — Alcohol On Board
  • APD — Acute Prozac Deficiency (depression)
  • APRS — (US) Acute Puerto Rican Syndrome (bouts of Screaming And Yelling)
  • APTFRAN — Apply Pillow To Face, Repeat As Necessary (for Annoying Patient)
  • AQP — Assuming The Q Position: Deteriorating Or Dying With Tongue Hanging Out
  • AQR — Ain’t Quite Right
  • ART — Approaching Room Temperature (dead)
  • AST — Assuming Seasonal Temperature (dead)
  • ATD — (US) Acute Tylenol Deficiency (simple Fever Or Head Cold)
  • ATFO — Asked To Fuck Off
  • ATL — (Scotland) Aff (off) The Legs; Meaning Unable To Walk
  • ATS — Acute Thespian Syndrome: Faking Illness; Known In US As MGM Syndrome
  • AWTB — Away With The Birds; A Patient Who Is Totally Confused
  • AWTF — Away With The Fairies; A Patient Who Is Totally Confused
  • B&T — Bagged And Tagged – Body Ready For Dispatch To Morgue
  • B-52 — Combined 5mg of Haldol IV + 2mg of Ativan IV
  • BBB — Blood-Brain Barrier – Surgical Drapes
  • BBCS — Bumps, Bruises, Cuts And Scrapes (i.e. No Serious Injuries)
  • BBLS — Belly-button Lint Sign – Male, Middle-aged, Overweight And Hairy (an Umbilicus That Looks Like The Lint (fluff) Trap In A Tumble Dryer Is Most Common In Overweight, Hairy, Older Men). Known As Belly-Button Fluff Sign In The UK.
  • BFF — Big, Fat Faker
  • BFH — Brat From Hell (usually Accompanied By PFH – Parent(s) From Hell)
  • BFH — “Big Fucking Head; Hydrocephalus As In A “”FLK With A BFH”” (can Be Metaphorical For Arrogant Consultant)”
  • BIT — Burp In Transit (gas Seen In The Stomach On An Abdominal Film)
  • BMT — Bowel-Movement Taco (faecal Matter Trapped In Female Genitalia)
  • BMW — Bitch Moan & Whine
  • BOHICA — Bend Over, Here It Comes Again
  • BSS — Bilateral Samsonite Syndrome: Patient Admitted With Both Their Bags Packed In Preparation
  • BTH — Bury The Hatchet – Accidently Leave A Surgical Instrument Inside A Patient.
  • BTSOOM — Beats The Shit Out of Me
  • BUNDY — But Unfortunately Not Dead Yet
  • BVA — Breathing Valuable Air
  • BWCO — Baby Won’t Come Out (needs Caesarian)
  • C&T WARD — “Coma Ward – “”cabbages And Turnips”””
  • C/C — Cancel Christmas (dead)
  • C2 — “A “”can’t C**t””; Lazy Physician Who Passes Off Work To Colleagues And Often Whines”
  • CABG — Coronary Artery Bypass Graft (Cabbage) – Heart Bypass
  • CAT6 — Triage Is Cat 1 (major) To Cat 5 (minor) So Cat 6 Means A Timewaster
  • CATS — Cut All To Shit
  • CBT — Chronic Burger/Biscuit Toxicity (obesity)
  • CCFCCP — Coo-coo For Co-Co Puffs (dementia Or Similar)
  • CF — Cockroach Factor – A Patient’s Ability To Survive Trauma Or Serious Treatment Is Inversely Proportional To His Contribution To Society.
  • CFD — Call For Dirt (severely Ill Or Dying)
  • CFT — Chronic Food Toxicity I.e. Obesity
  • CFU — Complete(ly) F*ck(ed) Up
  • CHAOS — Chronic Hurts All Over Syndrome (PTSD/Fibromyalgia, Etc.)
  • CHIBLOC — Closed Head Injury, Brief Loss of Consciousness
  • CIA — Chrome Induced Ischaemia – Patient That Develops Inexplicable Chest Pains When Arrested And Handcuffed
  • CKS — Cute Kid Syndrome
  • CLL — Chronic Low Life
  • CLOMI — Cat Like Observation And Masterful Inactivity (patient Under Observation)
  • COPD — Chronic Old Persons Disease (unwell, No Specific Cause)
  • COSMONAUT — “Cat Owner, Smells, Made of Nuts And Used Tampons (“”mad Cat Lady”” With Poor Hygiene And Body Odour)”
  • CPM — Calcified Penisitis Morbidium – Male Patient Whose Ailment Is Due To Excessive Or Unprotected Sex
  • CRAFT — Can’t Remember A Fucking Thing
  • CRI — Cranial-Rectal Insertion Or Cranial-Rectal Inversion (head-up-ass Syndrome)
  • CROACC — Cannot Rule Out Anything, Correlate Clinically
  • CRS — Can’t Remember Shit
  • CRT — Can’t Really Treat
  • CSD — Chronic Slapping Deficiency – Annoying/unruly Family Members Hitting Nurse’s Call Button Every 5 Minutes With Minor Requests/inane Questions Or For Fun
  • CTD — Circling The Drain (Close To Death)
  • CTF — Cletus The Fetus (US). A 23 Week, Or Earlier, Births That Parents Expect To Survive Against All Odds
  • CTS — Cold-tea Sign / Cold Tea Syndrome – Refers To The Several Cups of Cold Tea On The Bedside Cabinet Beside A Dead Geriatric (i.e. No-one Noticed The Patient Had Died)
  • CTS — Crazier Than Shit
  • CYA — Cover Your Ass; Unnecessary Procedure/prescription Done To Avoid Being Sued
  • D&D — Divorced And Desperate (middle Aged Female Who Visits Doctor Weekly Just For Male Attention)
  • D&D — Death And Donuts (night Shift)
  • DACB — (US) Drunk As Cooter Brown (UK Equivalent Is PAAF/PIAF)
  • DBI — Dirt Bag Index: Number of Tattoos X Number of Missing Teeth = Days Since The Patient Last Bathed
  • DENTIST — Doesn’t Even Need Treatment – It’s Sorted, Truly
  • DF — Dude Factor – Survival Scoring Factor Based On Social Worth. A High Dude Factor = An Individual of Questionable Social Worth Who Survives Near-fatal Injuries. A Low Dude Factor = Professional Person Who Slips In The Bathroom Sustaining A Fatal Injury
  • DFO — (US) Done Fell Out (anything From Fainting To Cardiac Arrest)
  • DFO — Drunk And Fell Over
  • DFO-SFJ — Done Fell Out – Screaming For Jesus
  • DIDC — Dose of I Don’t Care – Pain-killing Meds That Make Patient Light-headed
  • DIDR — Dose of I Don’t Remember – Pain-killing Meds That Leave Patient Without Memory of Painful Procedure
  • DIFFC — Dropped In For Friendly Chat (i.e. No Medical Problem)
  • DIIK — Darned If I Know
  • DILF — Doctor I’d Like To F*** (Fornicate With): Nursing Slang For Good-looking Doctor
  • DILLIGAF — Do I Look Like I Give A F*ck

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